Daily Blog #57 “Don’t give in to the suck.”

Tuesday late afternoon/early evening

Ever notice how somehow people are total trash and make your life hell for no reason?

Okay, so maybe they have a reason, but it sure as hell doesn’t seem good enough.

If we are close friends, you probably don’t know this: I have been having a hell of a fucking time lately, and I don’t want to burden anyone with that. Hence why many friends will straight up not know that I am struggling to keep it together at all.

Some readers who also follow me on social media, however, may have guessed, but that is hardly expected.

Now, I have no intention of whining on and on and on about how rough it has been. Yes, people have it so much worse than I do. So why should I complain?

No need to, I don’t want to bum anyone out, so INSTEAD I will make it some big motivational blog to perhaps help others.

Don’t give in to the suck.

Don’t let the zombies win.

As you may recall from past blogs, “Don’t let the zombies get you down” is an expression I often use when describing bad days and bad people.

So, without telling you all about the suck of my yesterday and today, let’s talk about the victories.

Mostly personal, as just about everyone I was dealing with was not being their best self.

I got snapped at, ridiculed, disrespected, yelled at, whined to, bitched out, griped at…I was the brunt of many jokes and mean statements, rampant sexism and racism, stress that is really not my job to have, and a myriad of other petty problems, drama, and basically a bunch of total bull shit, dropped on my head.

I also spent, during all of this, an insanely large amount of time on hold, on calls, in voicemails, talking to support people…Hell even talking to automated voices.

Turns out, people like being asked how they are doing, and they like even more you sincerely caring enough to hear the response.
(Abbi with a coy smirk that says, hey, try being nice to people, it really helps)

And guess what?

Not once was I mean. I asked names, I used names, I asked how people were doing, and, I also WAITED TO HEAR AND LISTENED TO their response.

Lots of those people were shocked, and also grateful, happy that someone treated them like a human.

No, I do not want a cookie for acting like a human being. I want to serve as an example. Plenty of people would have gotten short or snippy, more so when some of those people were kind of mean and rude to me, but I did not return their attitude. I simply put my smile on, because people really can hear it in your voice, and I treated everyone with the kindness, the simple mutual respect of a fellow human, that I always wish I could have.

Did it make other people who were being mean nicer to me? Not really. Some people on the phone dropped their attitude, which is all well and good, but the people in my life were by no means nicer for my efforts, and some even took this mood I was trying to have, and decided to continue being mean.

But, that is more about them, than it is about me. The way I act and react, is more about me.

And I don’t want to be a grumpy, miserable, rude, jackass.

I mean sure, I am a Slytherin, so cross me, or more importantly cross those I care about, I will flip that switch, but i like to be a good person.

So, I acted like a good person, and cool as that was, it was cooler to see some other people respond to it. One person on a support phone call even said it was such a relief to give someone bad news (did I mention I received mostly bad news on ALL of these calls?) and not have them flip out and scream and the poor person who simply told them the bad news.

This happened a few times, in varying degrees, but the top couple of people I am thinking of made me think that most people would have screamed and hollered and thrown fits, continuing the cycle of suck, continuing the cycle of hatefulness. Some people even admitted they were scared to tell me the bad news, for fear I would yell, as so many others do, when they don’t get the news they want. More so when they have been dumped on, over and over again, and they have a person they can yell at without consequence. But that only continues a cycle of suck that leads to even more people having days.

If you look, you will see someone else struggling just like you. Be kind to others to be kind to yourself. Treat others as kindly and compassionately as you hope to be treated, even with you aren’t.

I let it end with me. Why pass it on? Those people have homes they have to go to, that also probably need to be cleaned, they have problems in their own relationships, problems in their own families…Why should I make it worse? Why should I allow a mean asshole at my work to create another asshole at someone else’s work? If I snap at a support person, they could easily pass that sucky behavior on to some other accountant, in some other company, who just desperately wishes someone cared enough to be nice, or maybe see if they are able to keep their heads above water because it looks like maybe they are drowning…just like me.

Tuesday night

So, despite a bunch of shit I didn’t give into the suck and I managed to be nice to others despite getting shit on. I don’t need accolades- I just want others to realize we have the ability to make the world better, or at least not worse, by not giving into the suck.

So it’s later tonight and I need to get some rest, so I’ll wrap this up and say, hey, don’t give into the suck, we can all make the choice to not give in to the suckage, to rise above it all and carry on – and it just may make the world better.

Abbi

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