Daily Blog #65: “Social weekend, semi productive while lazy, and wedding planning.”

Sunday Late Afternoon/Early Evening


Well, it has been a very busy and productive weekend, but now I am being my own worst enemy for prepping for the week.


I have several things in need to accomplish and laziness has set in deeply into my bones.


I started to work on the “how to clean your bong” blog, after I realized I had lost my first version of it, and now I am in the middle of rewriting it, and the page keeps glitching out. So who knows, I may not even be able to post it today. Maybe it won’t go up on a Sunday.


I just…Wish I knew where the first one went, and wish this copy would work with me and let me recreate it to the best of my abilities.


Alas, it won’t, so I am working on my daily blog for tomorrow, even though really I should be tidying up my kitchen and doing some food prep. As I mentioned, I am being my own worst enemy.


I also just don’t feel very “up”. My period tracker says that in this part of my cycle it is usual, and some self care is a good thing, so maybe I will try to do something for myself later, but for now I need to feel like I did something, and I also need to get things done, so I thought, hey, lets blog.


But the Sunday prep blog is in limbo until that starts to work, and this daily blog is for tomorrow, but I guess I can write on it.


It is better than being productive and doing any of the things I don’t want to do.


So: Instead of that crap! I will work on my daily blog!


Yesterday, I went to my friends bridal shower, and had a lovely time. It was hosted at a family members home, and the lovely home made for a great location. The wedding is apparently being held in another person’s home, and it got me to thinking…Bret and I could totally get the wedding we want, if I could rent the right place.


You see, we both want a destination wedding, in a weed legal place, so we don’t have to worry or stress about enjoying ourselves at the various parties we would have for our wedding. We would also like our families to have a lovely time and to enjoy themselves, and I personally want everyone to have a relaxing time.


I like to host relaxing, fun events with thought out details and enjoyable, light moods, with delicious food and delightful drinks. And of course, nice weed.

A nice house, like this, but in a weed legal state and available on AirBnb


A destination wedding to somewhere where weed is legal, where our families could have fun, perhaps at a nice AirBnB, approved for events. They have entire parts of AirBnB dedicated to these types of places. When you account for the rehearsal dinner, ceremony and reception venue costs, and the costs of the wedding party having their own fun “turn up” celebrations, and hotels, if we get a nice AirBnB, we could actually save a ton of money.


If we work on deserts, or parts of the food, ourselves, we can save more, enough to maybe find another nice AirBnB to house a few more of our guests, to make it a peaceful nice time for everyone. If people help with the costs of their own accommodations, we can put that money towards our future.
So, last night I spent a large chunk of time looking at really nice AirBnB’s in nice area’s, and showing some of the nicer ones to Bret and my friend, Lenyn.


I found some options in Colorado and two or three in Lake Tahoe. Some of them are a BIT cost prohibitive, but also could be attainable.


But, the big thing here is how much it allows us to have the one, singular, one, wedding we want to have, and not have to have a big wedding full of people who don’t even want to come.


So, I need to put some feelers out and see how big of guest list we may have, but I have found some places, and I am going to carry on with some planning, because Bret and I have now been engaged for over one year, and we should probably start wedding planning something we want.


So, now I am going to go back to some wedding planning, and maybe play some idea games with Bret, because I need some chill time, and if I am going to be lazy, I should at least do something I want.



Monday Morning


Well I woke up early but the laziness is still real. I’m nursing a tea and trying to get moving but also answering emails and DMs from the weekend. I have over an hour to get to work, but my goal was to arrive a little early, so I’m working on getting out the door ASAP. First, however, I have to do my face and such, so I figured while I waited for my SPF and primer to set I could update this and work on my buzz for the morning.


I’m trying some tweaks to my skin care routine in the morning, and in general, to get my skin the hydration it needs- it’s been so dry and I am finally getting it under control- but I want to make sure my face is also matte enough for makeup, so it’s been a process of focusing on skin care first, with light makeup. Now that I have a nice rotation of products that keeps my skin In good shape, I can start picking new makeup products that work with that skin care routine. 


Thankfully, some products are truly quality and meant for all types of faces, and I have been leaning into the brands that do well on my skin to narrow down my personal choices in makeups as well. 


I just happen to enjoy skin care, so this has been a fun process.

Oh! Time for primer!



Monday Morning (Again)


Okay, got to work a few minutes early, with the goal to finish up and post this blog.


So, where were we….


Ah yes, the wedding planning. So I reached out to two of my main people of the bride side of the wedding party, Lenyn and Amber, and asked them their thoughts, both are super supportive of a destination wedding, a singular, just one, wedding that actually encompasses what we want.


My mother took my ideas of a weed friendly, hippy, mountain-ey, cold, area, and ran off on a tangent about how we could get some cabins in the middle of the woods out in fucking Tennessee, and “No one would mind if you puffed up a little” and “we could do touristy stuff in Gatlinberg and go “ride the whip of the dragon”. Basically, my mother decided to ignore every single reason I wanted to do a destination wedding, and tried to instead suggest a weekend that she wanted…instead of anything we want.


We don’t want to smuggle weed into a non weed friendly state, nor do we want to trust whatever dealers are in the area because chances are the weed would suck any damn way, to sit in some funky cabin in the woods, go tour racist crap, and be stuck in a car driving in a mountain on path they say looks like a dragons tail.


Anyone who knows me, actually ME, knows I don’t want anything to do with that.


I don’t drive. It isn’t a hobby of mine. I don’t like Tennessee. Sure, the mountains are nice, but they have them in Colorado, where they also have nicer cabins meant for weddings, not redneck reunion, and they also have legal weed.


I just don’t see why my dad can’t just take mom for this weekend she clearly wants, so she could maybe try and be supportive of what her daughter wants.


Anyways. So, mom is like “Oh well, just a suggestion” which anyone with a passive aggressive mom knows what that means, and I got stuck double guessing myself, certain if I don’t pick her terrible idea, the second something doesn’t go as she thinks it should, I will hear all about how “my idea would have been better”. It’s her suggesting I do the Renaissance fair as a wedding all over again.

Ideas for her, not for me.


I kept thinking we should do two weddings, one for mom to ruin with all of her plans, made with zero thought for the bride and groom, and then one that our families don’t know about, so no one can ruin it with their own agenda’s.


But we are TRYING to have one, singular wedding, with everyone, since we have to pay for it ourselves.


So it is frustrating when i finally find a solution I am comfortable with, that my mom steamrolls over my plans and just shoves some of her ideas down my throat.


Why the fuck couldn’t she just listen to MY ideas? She ISN’T paying for it, and I know I will probably pay for their accommodations wherever I have it to make it more affordable, so why the fuck can’t she just shut the fuck up and let me enjoy one second of the planning process?


Lenyn is young, with plenty going on on, and doesn’t want to talk endlessly about wedding crap, and I don’t blame him.


Amber has her own life going on, and frequently isn’t available for chats about this stuff. I helped plan her wedding, I know she is a busy lady, so even though she is one of my closer friends, I don’t want to burden her with stuff that she probably doesn’t have time for.


My mother has guilted me a 100 ways past Sunday about a wedding, and my grandma even wanted me to let mom help with the planning, and here I am, trying to include her, and she won’t even take into consideration what we want.


She just took the “destination” part and said “oh here near where we live is a destination I want to go to, have your wedding their so i have an excuse to take a trip all about me.”


This may sound shitty, but I am not about to fucking pay for a shitty wedding that isn’t what I want, and is instead an excuse for my mom to go do some shit.


Does my mother deserve a vacation? ABSOLUTELY.


But I deserve my wedding, more so when I AM THE ONE PAYING FOR IT.


Anyways, my mother doesn’t read my blog so I can vent, and if for some reason she does:


Mom, I want this wedding to be what I want, and I want you a part of the planning, so try and think about what I am wanting, and I will make sure to be considerate of your needs too. I will be helping y’all with the cost of coming, so don’t worry about that, and stop suggesting crappy places because they are cheap, or whatever else.


So I have found some nice places in Colorado, quite a few in Breckenridge, some would likely make nice spots for a small wedding and also nice place for the wedding party to crash.


I have also spotted some lovely places at great prices to house family, so our families wouldn’t have to spend time searching for a good deal. If possible, I would like to pay for the accommodations for both families, to make it easier on everyone involved.


With my family, it will likely only be my mother, and maybe the odd cousin or something, but I doubt anyone other than my mom and dad will come.


Bret’s family loves him, however, and is also bigger. His mother and Step-dad have three kids, none of which are grown, and then we have his grandparents and likely his uncle.

All are fairly religious and don’t do a lot of the “fun” stuff other people do, like drink or smoke weed.


So, we will need a sizable place for his family, and a nice little place for mine, plus a place for the bridal party and the wedding itself, which is where we will host the wedding party celebration (instead of bachelor/bachelorette parties) as well as the rehearsal dinner, ceremony, and reception. Finding a place that works for that much is a slight challenge, but if our guest list stays small, isn’t too hard.


Plus, if, I am living in/staying in the space, I can decorate and stage it.


Anyways, this has been a wedding planning update of sorts, and If you like this sort of thing, good, we will probably be doing plenty of blog, vlog, and posts all about the process.


But for now, I have work to do!


Till later,


Abbi

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