Daily Blog #142: A study in dedication on a Thursday

Thursday Afternoon

Greetings and Salutations, blog readers!

Today is Thursday and it has been a busy one, but I am hoping to catch it all up by this evening.

Last night’s plans went sideways, as they seem to do, but, the sideways they went wasn’t the worst in the world, so it is, ultimately, tolerable.

Bret was going to go to the club he will be playing at next week, but opted to stay in and work on his set to make sure he has enough music to fill the time slot they gave him, so that changed my plans, again. I had made plans, before he had intended on going to the club, I changed them to accommodate his change, and then he decided to not do the changed plan, or the original, which left me scrambling, and if I am being honest, I little annoyed, but I didn’t want to make a big deal about it.

Annoying as it was, it isn’t something that is going to be solved, and It isn’t a really big deal to begin with, I’m just a bit persnickety and like to plan for things so when plans get changed I get annoyed.

So, Bret stayed in to work on his stuff, and I did most of the grocery order using Amazon Prime Now, and tried to blog, but ended up scheduling a few blogs instead, after editing and illustrating them.

Which means I have blogs scheduled for both Saturday and Sunday this weekend, and Sunday next weekend. I have a couple more to edit, illustrate and schedule, plus any other blogs I decide to write, like this one.

But of course, much of the blog writing is also put to the side, so I can have time to also write creativly. The balance comes, I think, in writing a bunch of blogs, scheduling them, and then being able to dedicate time to creative writing without worrying about the blog taking some major hit.

During NaNoWriMo, the way I managed was to write the blogs first, schedule them, and then dive into writing, which got tricky on the days when I had a lot of writing to get done, so some days I would do writing first and….

The blog would take a major hit.

Now, I want to do a more organic self published route for my publishing and releasing of my writing, so having my blog be…well…sustainable, and able to generate reads/views/engagement, is helpful in releasing the creative writing. I can post much of it to the blog, which allows everyone with internet access who wishes to read my stuff, the ability to do so, without extra costs, like one would have when purchasing a book, digital book or physical book.

I think having a tip jar and subscription service open, so anyone who wants to donate money can, but anyone who wants to read, regardless of their money situation, can.

I want everyone who wants to be able to read, to read. This, obviously, will not be sustainable for every piece of writing I put out…the main story of Flake City, for example, will likely have some sort of cost to it.

But I can at least publish some of the supplemental materials for Flake City, on the blog, and if anyone wants to pay for it, they can, and if anyone wants to read it, they can, and if no one wants to, they don’t have to.

But they probably should, because Flake City is awesome.

So, I have mentioned a short mini story for Flake City, and I am hoping to attack that this weekend and finish it, so I can edit and hopefully illustrate next week. I also am in the middle of finishing this first section of Flake City, and editing it. The file has gown from when I first began writing in Flake City, a sign of a good universe being built, and now, as I go back through the story, taking notes and making note of scenes or information I need to add or remove, i am more and more pleased with how it is coming.

I don’t know if it is a good sign, or not, to be this pleased with what is, ostensibly, a first draft. I mean, we are talking about the first words that came to my mind and were plunked onto the keyboard.

Most writers I know and have read about aren’t this pleased by their work by the final copy, much less the first pass. Normally, writers, myself included, dread and hate every single moment of editing, and many more hate the process of releasing it to the public.

I am actually looking forward to edits, because I know it will help create an even better story and world, but also gets me closer to you all reading it.

Now, while I am SURE there will be plenty of people who don’t like Flake City, I am pumped for those who will like it. As some of you may recall, I am not here for everyone, and I do not even want everyone. I only want the fans that really want my stuff, and I have no interest in tricking anyone into being a fan of me or my writing. I only want to find those who do like it, and share it with them, growing that community of people.

Because the internet has plenty of nasty negative stuff on it…but like…I can control the internet, to a degree, and I can make it a nice little bubble of awesome, full of and populated by awesome people. And we can all talk and read zombies and real life, and how the two go hand in hand more often than not.

Because zombie stories are always based in some level of reality, be it social issues or just how people interact…or even in the viruses that are used, horrifyingly enough.

So, I am actually really excited and pumped for this next phase of Flake City, despite it being something most writers would hate doing. Normally, I am even in that group…but now that is all I want.

I love Flake City, I love the characters I have in it and I love the story. It probably sounds egotistical to like your own writing and such…but oh well.

They say create what you want to see created, and that is what I am doing…and if you are doing that very thing, then OF COURSE you will like what you are creating…

Did you ever think that maybe THAT is why they tell you to do this stuff? To do what you love? To create what you want to see created?

Oh…I think that is, huh?

So, speaking of the editing and publishing process, the next few months look to be very busy for me as i work to get Flake City released soon. My goal is to release the proper story of Flake City, the main story that will be the book/show, by the weekend after Thanksgiving…

Why?

Because in Flake City, that’s when all the action starts. Of course, anyone with any skills or knowledge in marketing would likely say, “Hey, Abbi, maybe have it out the week of Halloween instead.” This may also be the case. Either way, end of October or middle end of November…I have a ton of work to get done in a short period of time, and I am a writing, editing, illustrating, publishing and marketing team of one.

So, these goals for Flake City take dedication. Just like everything else in my life right now, I am actively working on and building towards a better situation and life for myself and my partner, and our goals are to one day be able to support ourselves with the art.

This means massive amounts of dedication, which is what I wanted to talk to everyone about today.

Flake City is my passion and I love it, and it is also only one small part of a pretty massive universe that I have been working through for years. I have grown as a writer, a person, and a creative, and I am finally, by my own standards, qualified to start really telling these stories and presenting these ideas to people so that others can enjoy them too.

It has taken a lot to get here, not just dedication, hell, some of it was merely survival, but now, I am here, and I am highly dedicated to not only my writing, but my overall goals, which means all those life changes I have been working on…somehow become easier.

I have been arriving to work thirty minutes to an hour early every day to get a bit more money on my check, but also to have more done by the end of the week and go into the weekend with less work related stress. Work related stress takes time away from creativity and gives that time to my boss who already doesn’t pay me enough.

So, I have been coming in early with the hopes of having more money on my check and less stress on my weekends. I am also going to come in on Fridays, after weeks and months of trying to get Fridays off, and leave when I hit overtime on Friday…or if I get stuck tending to problems, enjoy even more money on my check in the way of overtime…but I try to avoid this because the taxes on overtime pay are insane, and we don’t have social programs that justify high taxes in my opinion.

Because frankly, I am okay with paying taxes…If we have social programs that make those taxes legit. Tax breaks for rich people are not a good enough reason.

So, my plan moving forward is to come in at my usual or earlier time on Fridays and leave when I get into overtime, to guarantee to max on my check without costing the company more money or getting taxed too hard, and also to have my massive piles of work finished so I can go into my weekend in a calmer state of mind with less work related stress.

I firmly believe that work shouldn’t follow you home, and I am actively doing all I can to keep it from doing that, more than when it has to from coworkers missing their clock out times and needing to text me. If I can avoid the stress of work, as much as possible, I can come home and just segue into doing my writing, and getting the blog up, while also working out and keeping the apartment nice and tidy, all of which makes me happy while also helping me achieve my goals.

Because this isn’t the place I want to work for the rest of my life and this isn’t the place I want to live for the rest of my life. Changing my life and making it into the life I want, not the one I was born into, is tricky, and requires no small amount of dedication.

But I am here for it.

I hope you are also pursuing your dreams and goals, making lists of what needs to be done or changed to see your dreams come to fruition. Everyone deserves to lead a good life, the kind they can be proud of.

Everyone deserves to do what makes them happy, to cast off the boring monotony of being a muggle or zombie, and to really do what makes them happy, what makes them whole. Them. Not what society, family, friends, or anyone else says is right for them, but what they want. (Except for like murder, rape, or being an asshole, if that is what you want to do, maybe think of another hobby. Rock collecting is cool, for example.)

So whatever your art is, please make sure you take time to make yourself happy. Take time for you. Doing things for yourself is a key part of self care, and creating things you wish to see created is a key component in that.

I may or may not continue this later. If I do, it’s because of my dedication, and if I don’t, ironically, it will be because of my dedication to the writing…so I hope you have dedication for the life you want, because you deserve it.

But deserving it doesn’t mean you get it. So, through dedication, perhaps we will all get there.

Later

Well, I was thinking more on dedication, and I realized I may want to blog some more on this topic, in a part two. But then, as I was thinking about editing this blog, I realized I could maybe write a little more and get some more about dedication out, while also, obviously, being a living example of that dedication.

Plus, all day today, I was exhausted, but I went to bed early. Tomorrow is Friday, so if I am tired, its all good anyhow. If I am going to be tired anyways, I should go ahead and write a bit.

Because like, if you are going to be exhausted, and possibly up late because your partner keeps going back and forth about going out, but is likely to be out late, then why not write?

Dedication isn’t just carving out time to write, or making crazy sacrifice. Sometimes, it’s taking an opportunity you didn’t see before, or that you don’t normally have. Sometimes it’s realizing you are going to be tired, so be happy, from your effort that made you tired. I personally would much rather be tired from staying up late and doing what I love, writing, than going to bed early and still being fucking exhausted.

So it is just after ten, and I am pretty tired, and I would like to get some writing done, before I stop for the day. While I would rather be tired from writing than going to bed early and still being tired, I do want to make sure I balance the the blog writing with the creative writing. I also have to do the dishes, which have piled up, so I have quite a bit left in my evening, if you include formatting and editing this blog, plus, I would like to go ahead and start the next daily blog file, as soon as possible…so I need to get to all of that.

I hope you all had a wonderful Thursday and I hope we all have a Fantastic Friday.

Thanks for reading!

Abbi

Published by Abbi Grasso

I’m write and stuff. I write meta fiction, cannabis content, and modern fantasy. Sometimes separate, sometimes all at once. I focus on the meta more than anything. I make stuff too, not just universes.

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